In a Sexless Marriage? Here's How to Reignite the Flame.

Are you frustrated with a lack of intimacy in your marriage? If you and your partner have been together for years, it’s easy to push intimacy to the back burner. Maybe you feel like your sex life has been sidelined after having children, or perhaps the stresses of everyday life have simply taken center stage in your relationship. You miss the closeness you used to feel with your partner, and you wish you could bring that feeling back.

Reviving that spark you once knew won’t happen overnight. But with time and effort from both you and your partner, you can definitely rekindle your romance. Here’s how to reignite intimacy if you’ve been struggling in a sexless marriage.

Address The Root Issue

First, it’s important to understand exactly why you and your partner haven’t been intimate. Maybe you’ve both been stressed about work, and you haven’t been in the mood for anything romantic for a while. Perhaps you’ve been so busy caring for your children that finding time for each other feels next to impossible. Or maybe the two of you haven’t been communicating well lately, and you simply feel distant from your partner. By talking through any barriers to intimacy you’ve been experiencing, you can figure out which problems have come between you and your partner. Only then will you have the power to address the root cause.

Romanticize Your Everyday Life

You can always choose to bring a little more romance into your daily life! Write your partner love notes and leave them around the house where they will find them, or surprise your partner with flowers on a random day. Put on songs that you both love while you cook dinner, and give your partner gifts when they don’t expect it. Chances are, your partner will want to do the same for you!

Be Affectionate

Sometimes, you might not even realize that it’s been a while since you were simply affectionate with your partner. Holding your partner’s hand when you’re going for a walk, or giving them a kiss on the cheek at a random time, can help you feel more intimate. Touching your partner and being affectionate brings a little more joy into your day.

Cultivate Emotional Intimacy

Emotional intimacy can help you get back to physical intimacy in time. When was the last time you and your partner sat down to open up about your feelings? Can you remember your last deep conversation? Do you feel like there’s anything you need to say to each other that you’ve been holding back? If so, you need to spend time working on emotional intimacy before you focus on physical intimacy. This could be a great time to start scheduling more date nights when you and your partner can focus solely on each other.

Seek Couples Counseling

What if you feel like you and your partner have been trying to reignite your relationship for a while—but you haven’t made any progress? You may need to look to a couples counselor for support and guidance. The idea of going to couples counseling might make you worry that you’re giving up on your relationship. But in reality, it’s the opposite. Going to couples counseling together means that you’re committed to working on your relationship and starting a new chapter together. With the help of a therapist, you can get a valuable new perspective on reviving intimacy in your relationship

Are you and your partner struggling to reignite the flame in your relationship? Working with a couples therapist can help. Contact us today to discuss your options for scheduling your first session.